Revisiting ~ Proverbs 20 ~ The Truth Hurts

Photo Copyright 2011 Alycia W. Morales

"Blows that hurt cleanse away evil,

So do stripes the inner depths of the heart."

~ Proverbs 20:30

A month ago, my youngest tripped over a broken brick the kids had used as a base for baseball in our yard. If he'd been wearing shoes, it wouldn't have mattered. But because he ran barefoot, it left a gash in his flesh. 

He almost needed stitches, but my husband proficiently bandaged it using butterflies and large cover Band-aids. With enough anti-biotic cream and daily rinses of the wound, he healed without infection.

His wound, however, left a lovely scar on his foot. A daily reminder to wear his shoes when he plays outdoors.

So many times in life, I've ignored authority and tried doing things my own way. Each time, I've been left with an ugly wound; a daily reminder of my sinful and rebellious nature. 

As I've turned my life over to Jesus, depending on Him to meet my needs and direct my paths, these wounds have healed. They've scabbed over, so I no longer feel their pain. But the process is never simple or painless.

As the Proverb describes, blows that hurt cleanse away evil. Stripes cleanse the inner depths of the heart. To put it another way, "The truth hurts."

As a young Christian, I had several people around to tell me the Truth. God's Truth was a lot different than my personal truth. Hearing how wrong I was never felt good. Sometimes I didn't receive it well, either. It took several ladies and a few good men bringing that Truth in love for me to accept that I needed to change a few things within my heart.

In their obedience to speak that Truth through the prompting of the Holy Spirit, my heart became receptive and began to change. 

The process of pulling up bitter roots is never quick or easy. It takes hard work, persistence, and time. But in the end, after the hole is filled with the love of Jesus Christ, the pain recedes, new seeds are planted and new life springs forth.

Will you allow God to pull up your roots today, replacing your personal truth with His Truth? Sorrow may last for the night as you deal with the pain. But joy comes in the morning as your heart heals under the anointing balm of Jesus!

Revisting ~ Proverbs 17 ~ Shut Up!

Photo Courtesy of Vivek Chugh

"He who has knowledge spares his words,

And a man of understanding is of a calm spirit.

Even a fool is counted wise when he holds his peace;

When he shuts his lips, he is considered perspective."

~ Proverbs 17:27-28

"You need to share something." Vic prodded me with his elbow as we sat in Wednesday night class at church. 

I shrugged and shook my head. I didn't have anything to add to the conversation. Everything I might have said had been said already. I wasn't hearing anything in my spirit. I had nothing to say.

I understand my husband's point. The Word tells us to be ready in season and out of season. (2 Timothy 4:2)

But I've also learned that it is far better to keep my mouth shut than to speak when I have nothing important or edifying to say. I'd rather be considered wise than to open my mouth just to say something and end up sounding like a fool. 

Or worse, doing more harm than good. Proverbs 10:19 says, "In the multitude of words sin is not lacking, But he who restrains his lips is wise." It's better to keep my mouth shut and glean from others than to open it wide and say something ridiculous.

It applies at home, too. It's better for me to shut up and stop responding, defending, or getting offensive when my husband and I are in a heated disagreement than it is to continue speaking. After all, "A soft answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger." (Proverbs 15:1) Our discussions take a turn toward unity when I refuse to argue anymore. (Marital Tip: When one of you wins an argument, neither of you wins. Because someone loses. Marriage isn't 50/50. It's 100% of both of you.)

Over the years I have found that keeping my mouth shut allows me the opportunity to listen to and learn from others. Sometimes I gain more wisdom. Sometimes I recognize what I don't want to be like. 

How about you? Do you enjoy gleaning from others' wisdom by keeping your mouth from over-talking? Or do you like to add to the conversation at all times? It's a challenging quest, I know... 

Revisiting ~ Proverbs 12 ~ The Good Wife

Photo Copyright 1998 Debbie Burchard

"An excellent wife is the crown of her husband,

But she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones."

~ Proverbs 12:4

In case you couldn't tell, my heart beats for marriages. Good, strong, Christian marriages. Can a couple who doesn't hold Jesus at the center of their relationship still have a good marriage? Sure. There's just something incredible and amazing about a marriage with Christ at the center of it...

In this Proverb, we hear about an excellent wife and a not-so-excellent wife. Let me paint a picture of both for you: 

The excellent wife turns to the Lord every day. She reads the Bible, spends time in prayer, fellowships with God. Because she needs to. She loves her Lord and can't ever get enough of Him. She loves her family. She serves her husband, assists him with daily life and gives herself for him, submitting to his authority in their home. She takes care of her children, trains them up in the way they should go. She manages their home. She serves in her local church. She knows how to say "no" so her schedule doesn't take the place of family time. Her husband's heart safely trusts her (see Proverbs 31), and he knows she loves Jesus first, which allows her to love him in a more complete way. She's the good wife. 

The other wife puts herself before all others. Even the Lord. She doesn't have a strong relationship with Jesus, if she has one at all. She doesn't seek godly counsel. She seeks her own will. She never agrees with her husband; she consistently struggles against him. Her home is not filled with peace; it is filled with strife. Her children reflect her behaviors. Her husband is embarrassed by her. He puts a wall up, trying to distance himself from her. He no longer wishes to know the love of his youth. He wants to get away. She is destroying his life, making him miserable. He begins to despise her. She is rottenness to his bones. His health as a husband fades rapidly. She has become like a cancer to him. Eating at him from the inside out. She is not the good wife. She is evil.

The Word of God says that we know people according to their fruit. Good fruit is good fruit. Bad fruit is bad fruit. You don't get good fruit from a bad tree. Even children are known by their deeds, what they do is either wrong or right. There is no "little bit of evil in good" or "little bit of good in evil." We are all sinners. None of us is perfect or good. Not one.

But the blood of Jesus...it covers all sin. When we accept Christ into our hearts and our lives, we have a chance of righteousness. We need to allow Him into our marriages, too. A three-stranded chord (Jesus, My Husband, Me) is not easily broken. When Jesus is in the center of our marital relationship, we cannot be easily torn apart.

But when we leave Jesus out of the equation, we lose the opportunity to keep our marital bond tight. The enemy stands, waiting for any opportunity to destroy God's covenant relationship between a man and a woman. And he will succeed, if we refuse to turn to Jesus. 

I've watched many marriages fall apart. The statistics are staggeringly similar between Christian marriages and non-Christian marriages. Both have almost the same divorce rate. What kind of glory does that give God? Not much. It testifies to human failure and a refusal to stand for God's divine plan. 

I don't say this to put down anyone who's a Christian and has been through divorce. I say this to encourage you to consider your marriage. Or your next marriage. Make sure you are marrying the one prince God has in store for you. Make sure you include Jesus in your marriage. You stand a better chance of making it last when you do. 

And remember...healthy marriages take work. Just like we need to eat healthy foods, exercise, get enough rest and get out in the sunlight, our marriages need work as well. Prayer, communication, financial stability, loyalty, and much, much more build strong marriages. Neglecting marriage, like neglecting one's health, sets it up for death.

What does your marriage look like? Is it time to pump Jesus vitamins in to attack the bad vibes? Or is your marriage a healthy three-stranded chord?

Three Steps to Victory

Well, here it is. My first video blog. 

Disclaimer:

• I was nervous about making this. I didn't know if I had anything to say. So I said it.
• I said a couple of "um"s and tripped over my tongue on occasion.
• It's a little longer than five minutes (I know, the ideal length for one of these.), by like, five minutes. So please bear with my first attempt and kindly watch all the way through. Next time it will be shorter, I promise. I do value your time as much as my own.

That being said, I hope you enjoy hearing about Three Steps to Victory.

Proverbs 28 - Detestable Prayers

"One who turns away his ear from hearing the law,

Even his prayer is an abomination."

~ Proverbs 29:9

My children bring their requests before me every day. "Mom, can I?" "Mom, I want..." "Mom, will you...?" By the end of the day, I want to change my name. I want peace and quiet. I want to be left alone for a few moments of quiet solitude.

I long to fulfill the desires of my children. Whether they want to go to a friend's house, get the newest toy on the market, or take a walk in the park while holding my hand, this mother's heart wishes it could provide all things to my children. 

Alas, I cannot. Sometimes it's because they don't need what they're asking for, and I don't have the extra money in our checking account to provide it. Other times, it's because I know the result of granting their wish would put them in jeopardy. Whatever the reason, when I say no, I expect them to accept my answer. Without whining. Without complaint. Without debate.

Our Father in heaven is the same. Sometimes He answers our requests as soon as we ask Him. Other times, we are required to wait on His perfect timing. And still other times, He denies our request.

When we don't get what we want from God, we need to consider why He said no. Is it because what we asked for isn't in His will for our well-being? Is it because He knows we don't need it?

Or could it be because He refused to hear it?

There are times when my children have pushed and pushed for things after they've ignored my requests for them to clean their rooms or to stop hitting each other. Sometimes they've disrespected me, and I refuse to honor their requests in their refusal to honor mine.

God makes it very clear that when we refuse to follow His law, even our prayers become an abomination. The NIV Bible calls them "detestable." 

Just as I turn to my children and say, "Why should I answer your request when you refuse to do as I've asked you?" I can hear God say the same to human beings. Why would a righteous and just God answer the prayers of an unrighteous and unjust man? 

"He who has My commandments and keeps them, it is he who loves Me. And he who loves Me will be loved by My Father, and I will love him and manifest Myself to him.” - John 14:21

Just as I feel loved by my children when they honor me and keep the rules of the house, God knows I love Him when I honor and keep His commands.

If I'm not receiving an answer to my prayers, I go before the Lord to make certain my heart is right with Him before asking again. Sometimes, He's simply asking me to wait. Occasionally, I need to repent of my disobedience to His law.

But I know that when my heart's right with Him, He hears my prayers.

Photo Courtesy of Jesper Noer

Proverbs 27 - Rebuke in the Name of Love

"Open rebuke is better

Than love carefully concealed."

~ Proverbs 27:5

As a parent, there are many times I have to rebuke my children. They need to know when they're doing something that isn't Christ-like. Otherwise, they'll continue in a destructive path and end up hurt because of my lack of discipline.

Sometimes my husband brings a word of rebuke to me. He's quick to let me know when I'm out of line in an area. Why? Because God commands him to love me as Christ loved the church. He laid His life down for His bride.  He didn't come to cover up our sin. He came to expose it.

What does that have to do with Proverbs 27:5? A lot.

Jesus didn't sugar coat things, trying to woo the disciples to follow after Him. No. He told them like it is. He didn't conceal His love for them by allowing them to think what they wanted and continue in their unbelief, doubt, or any other sinful part of their character. He brought correction when correction needed to be brought.

Open rebuke is better than love carefully concealed.

It never helps someone overcome their issues if leaders and family members try to avoid hurting their feelings by avoiding open rebuke. 

Jesus always brings correction in love. He is gentle, patient, and kind. When we follow His example, we have the ability to bring rebuke out of our love for one another. 

I remember multiple times when I've been openly rebuked by someone who loves me. It's had definite impacts on my life. I wouldn't be where I am today without those people and their loving correction. 

How about you? Can you remember a time when someone rebuked your sinful way and changed your life?

Photo Courtesy of Andre M.

Proverbs 23 - Deliverance

"Do not withhold correction from a child,

 For if you beat him with a rod, he will not die.

 You shall beat him with a rod,

 And deliver his soul from hell."

 ~ Proverbs 23:13-14

 

My middle son, Caleb, can be a handful at times. He is extremely curious (good thing), but he gets himself into trouble when he has nothing to occupy his time with (bad thing). He is extremely bright (good thing), but he can be a big bully to his siblings if he sees them making mistakes (bad thing). He has a dogged tenacity (we named him well), but unrestrained, it has negative effects on his life (not so good).

 

If I left Caleb to his own devices, he would have an uncontrollable temper, be a bully to others, and be outright rebellious, thinking he could get away with whatever he wanted to.

 

Discipline is necessary in order to teach children self-control. The Word of God says to beat a child so that he will learn his lesson and be delivered from hell. It doesn't say coddle him and love on him in the hope that he will stop his rebellious behavior. It says to spank him. It also says, "He shall not die."

Jesus says in Matthew 10:28, "And do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. But rather fear Him who is able to destroy both soul and body in hell." Correcting a child with a rod (either physical or verbal) so that he learns right from wrong in the eyes of God will spare him certain eternal death if he continues in his rebellious path of destruction. Balanced with teaching them God's Word, you are training them up in the way they should go, so when they are old they won't depart from God's Truth.

 

I know this is a really touchy subject. Moms have been told they can't spank their child, because others have abused the method of correction and turned it into physical abuse. The same could be said of verbal discipline. Many parents have run with their angry emotions and turned to abusing their children verbally and emotionally with their words.That is not what I am promoting.

 

I am promoting a healthy wooden spoon smack on the fat of the child's hiney when their rebellion calls for it. I'm not saying spank a child for putting their hand in the cookie jar or forgetting to do her chore. Outright rebellion looks different than a minor infraction. It resembles an opportunity for death or harm, such as disobeying you and running out into the street -- or consistent lying and deceit. 

 

For minor infractions, a good talking to should be sufficient, or a time out. 

 

But once in awhile a parent finds a need for a more hefty punishment. 

 

Which reminds me of Jesus. Jesus was free of sin. He lived an innocent life. Yet we, as humans born into sin, are not so innocent. God the Father saw fit to bring a rod of punishment upon His own Son in order to set us free from certain eternal death. If our Father in heaven loved us so much to put His Son through the torment and pain of the road to the cross so we could recognize our rebellion, why do we cringe at the thought of spanking a child in order to turn him/her away from theirs? 

 

Just a thought...

 

And by the way, I cry when I have to resort to using the wooden spoon on the fatty part of my children's hineys. You can rest assured I don't abuse my kids. Nor do I like spanking.

 

Photo Copyright 2009 Alycia W. Morales 

Proverbs 21 - Convicted

"Every way of a man is right in his own eyes,
  But the Lord weighs the hearts."
  ~ Proverbs 21:2

Have you ever had one of those moments when you thought you were in the right, that what you felt was truth, only to discover a minute, an hour, or three days later that you were utterly mistaken? God's voice pierces your thought life and gently whispers, "By the way, you were wrong the other day. You should go back and correct that."

Your heart sinks. You stand convicted.

Many people thought they were right over 2000 years ago. They screamed, "Crucify Him!" They wanted an innocent man dead. They let a convicted killer go free in His stead. 

Later, two men hung on the crosses beside Him. At first, both mocked him. And then, one had a change of heart. He came under conviction. 

"Do you not even fear God, seeing you are under the same condemnation? And we indeed justly, for we receive the due reward of our deeds; but this Man has done nothing wrong." He turns to Jesus, "Lord, remember me when You come into Your kingdom." The first sinner's prayer is whispered at Calvary.

And Jesus answers, "Assuredly, I say to you, today you will be with Me in paradise." (See Luke 23:39-43)

Jesus understands what it feels like to be convicted. Whether what we do is right or wrong, our Savior understands the need to make things right. He understands the humility of having to face our sins. 

Sometimes, we think we're just plain right. But the Lord weighs our hearts. And then we discover just how wrong we really are. 

If you hear God whispering a word of correction today, make the effort to make things right. Repent, like the thief on the cross. Confess your sin to your Savior. Get a glimpse of heaven today when God moves in your heart. 

Photo Copyright 2010 Alycia W. Morales 

Proverbs 20 - The Truth Hurts

"Blows that hurt cleanse away evil,

So do stripes the inner depths of the heart."

~ Proverbs 20:30

A month ago, my youngest tripped over a broken brick the kids had used as a base for baseball in our yard. If he'd been wearing shoes, it wouldn't have mattered. But because he ran barefooted, it left a gash in his flesh. 

He almost needed stitches, but my husband proficiently bandaged it using butterflies and large cover Band-aids. With enough anti-biotic cream and daily rinses of the wound, he healed without infection.

His wound, however, left a lovely scar on his foot. A daily reminder to wear his shoes when he plays outdoors.

So many times in life, I've ignored authority and tried doing things my own way. Each time, I've been left with an ugly wound; a daily reminder of my sinful and rebellious nature. 

As I've turned my life over to Jesus, depending on Him to meet my needs and direct my paths, these wounds have healed. They've scabbed over, so I no longer feel their pain. But the process is never simple or painless.

As the Proverb describes, blows that hurt cleanse away evil. Stripes cleanse the inner depths of the heart. To put it another way, "The truth hurts."

As a young Christian, I had several people around to tell me the Truth. God's Truth was a lot different than my personal truth. Hearing how wrong I was never felt good. Sometimes I didn't receive it well, either. It took ladies and a few good men bringing that Truth in love for me to accept that I needed to change a few things within my heart.

And in their obedience to speak that Truth through the prompting of the Holy Spirit, my heart became receptive and began to change. 

The process of pulling up bitter roots is never quick or easy. It takes hard work, persistence, and time. But in the end, after the hole is filled with the love of Jesus Christ, the pain recedes, new seeds are planted, and new life springs forth.

Will you allow God to pull up your roots today, replacing your personal truth with His Truth? Sorrow may last for the night as you deal with the pain. But joy comes in the morning as your heart heals under the anointing balm of Jesus!

Photo Copyright 2011 Alycia W. Morales 

Proverbs 19 - Ear Muffs

"Cease listening to instruction, my son,

 And you will stray from the words of knowledge."

 ~ Proverbs 19:27

I listened to instruction from my parents until I turned...eleven? Twelve? And by the time I turned sixteen, I stopped. I heard their words, but I didn't receive the instruction.

And I strayed far, far away from their words of knowledge.

Teenagers think they know it all. By the time children hit the age of eleven, they're trying to tell their parents what's what. My son tries so hard to know what he's talking about. Half the time I'm correcting his misinformation, which he loves to share with his siblings. I understand he's coming to a place in life where he desires to feel a bit more independent. I know he's trying to express himself and is looking for my approval, attention, and affection. But he doesn't know it all, yet. He doesn't have a clue.

I remember being a teen and thinking I knew it all. Yep. Even though I'm nearing forty, I haven't forgotten the plight of finding myself. I disregarded the words of knowledge my parents taught me since birth. Disregarding those words sent me places I never would have desired to go if I'd known about them beforehand. Places like Lonely Land, Regret Road, Shameful Place, and Death Row. 

One of my favorite scriptures is James 1:13-15.

"Let no one say when he is tempted, 'I am tempted by God'; for God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does He Himself tempt anyone.

But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed.

Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, brings forth death."

Let me give you a visual illustration of this process, which ties into the fact that when we cease listening to instruction, we stray from the words of knowledge.

I quit going to church by the time I entered eighth grade. I started reading romance novels at this time. Not Christian romance. The hot, steamy romance novels my mother had on the shelves in the office loft. The temptation to read these overcame me, and I sneaked them to school. I would sit in English class with the romance novel stuck inside my reading book. Guess which one I was reading...

Which led to a deeper desire for a boy to want me. I dreamed of being swept away by and handsome and strapping man. Only these were boys. Not men. Thus began my desperate search for true love and a lifetime of regrets and shame. Desire had conceived in my heart. This is the point where I put my ear muffs on and drowned out the words of knowledge my parents tried to plant. I refused to allow them to water my soul, and the plant withered and died. For awhile.

My desire lead me straight into sin. Boy after boy. Relationship after relationship. I just wanted to be desired and loved the way I desired and loved. 

Until one day, my sin matured and lead me straight to death's door.

I wasn't in physical danger of dying. But my insides had died to the point that I took another life. I built up a wall of defense for so long that no life could live inside of me. Against every word of knowledge I'd ever clung to, and against what I knew was right, I had an abortion. My sin lead to the death of an innocent child.

When we cease listening to instruction, to wisdom, to the words of God and the parents He placed in our lives, we stray from those words. We lose our moral compass. We stray off the path God has chosen for us and wander in our self-inflicted wilderness for too long. I know. I've been there. I've done that. It only leads to death.

The one blessing in all of the curses I brought upon myself is that Jesus' light shone at the end of my tunnel. I knew as I lay on the cold, metal table of the Planned Parenthood clinic, listening to the sound of the Shop Vac suck the life out of me, that Jesus was my salvation from Death Row. I went back to my dorm room that night, called my mother, and confessed what I'd done. In her love, she explained that she and my father had found a new church and invited me home to join them. That same month, I found the Love of my Life. Jesus has loved me and desired me more than any other relationship ever could or will. 

And He's there for you, too, if you'll only ask...

Photo Courtesy of amminopurr

Proverbs 17 - Shut Up

"He who has knowledge spares his words,

And a man of understanding is of a calm spirit.

Even a fool is counted wise when he holds his peace;

When he shuts his lips, he is considered perspective."

~ Proverbs 17:27-28

"You need to share something." Vic prodded me with his elbow as we sat in Wednesday night class at church. 

I shrugged and shook my head. I didn't have anything to add to the conversation. Everything I might have said had been said already. I wasn't hearing anything in my spirit. I had nothing to say.

I understand my husband's point. The Word tells us to be ready in season and out of season. (2 Timothy 4:2)

But I've also learned that it is far better to keep my mouth shut than to speak when I have nothing important or edifying to say. I'd rather be considered wise than to open my mouth just to say something and end up sounding like a fool. 

Or worse, doing more harm than good. Proverbs 10:19 says, "In the multitude of words sin is not lacking, But he who restrains his lips is wise." It's better to keep my mouth shut and glean from others than to open it wide and say something ridiculous.

 

It applies at home, too. It's better for me to shut up and stop responding, defending, or getting offensive when my husband and I are in a heated disagreement than it is to continue speaking. After all, "A soft answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger." (Proverbs 15:1) Our discussions take a turn toward unity when I refuse to argue anymore. (Marital Tip: When one of you wins an argument, neither of you wins. Because someone loses. Marriage isn't 50/50. It's 100% of both of you.)

Over the years I have found that keeping my mouth shut allows me the opportunity to learn from others. Sometimes I gain more wisdom. Sometimes I recognize what I don't want to be like. 

How about you? Do you enjoy gleaning from others' wisdom by keeping your mouth from over-talking? Or do you like to add to the conversation at all times? It's a challenging quest, I know... 

Photo Courtesy of Vivek Chugh 

Proverbs 12 - The Good Wife

"An excellent wife is the crown of her husband,

But she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones."

~ Proverbs 12:4

In case you couldn't tell, my heart beats for marriages. Good, strong, Christian marriages. Can a couple who doesn't hold Jesus at the center of their relationship still have a good marriage? Sure, I bet they can. There's just something incredible and amazing about a marriage with Christ at the center of it...

 

In this Proverb, we hear about an excellent wife and a not-so-excellent wife. Let me paint a picture of both for you: 

 

The excellent wife turns to the Lord every day. She reads the Bible, spends time in prayer, in fellowship with God. Because she needs to. She loves her Lord and can't ever get enough of Him. She loves her family. She serves her husband, assists him with daily life, and gives herself for him, submitting to his authority in their home. She takes care of her children, trains them up in the way they should go. She manages their home. She serves in her local church. She knows how to say "no" so her schedule doesn't take the place of family time. Her husband's heart safely trusts her (see Proverbs 31), and he knows she loves Jesus first, which allows her to love him in a more complete way. She's the good wife. 

 

The other wife puts herself before all others. Even the Lord. She doesn't have a strong relationship with Jesus, if she has one at all. She doesn't seek godly counsel. She seeks her own will. She never agrees with her husband; she consistently struggles against him. Her home is not filled with peace. It is filled with strife. Her children reflect her behaviors. Her husband is embarrassed by her. He begins to put a wall up, trying to distance himself from her. He no longer wishes to know the love of his youth. He wants to get away. She is destroying his life, making him miserable. He begins to despise her. She is rottenness to his bones. His health as a husband fades rapidly. She has become like a cancer to him. Eating at him from the inside out. She is not the good wife. She is evil.

 

The Word of God says that we know people according to their fruit. Good fruit is good fruit. Bad fruit is bad fruit. You don't get good fruit from a bad tree. Even children are known by their deeds, what they do is either wrong or right. There is no "little bit of evil in good" or "little bit of good in evil." We are all sinners. None of us is perfect or good. Not one.

But the blood of Jesus...it covers all sin. When we accept Christ into our hearts and our lives, we have a chance of righteousness. We need to allow Him into our marriages, too. A three-stranded chord (Me, Jesus, My Husband) is not easily broken. When Jesus is in the center of our marital relationship, we cannot be easily torn apart.

But when we leave Jesus out of the equation, we lose the opportunity to keep our marital bond tight. The enemy stands, waiting for any opportunity to destroy God's covenant relationship between a man and a woman. And he will succeed, if we refuse to turn to Jesus. 

I've watched many marriages fall apart. The statistics are staggeringly similar between Christian marriages and non-Christian marriages. Both have almost the same divorce rate. What kind of glory does that give God? Not much. It testifies to human failure and a refusal to stand for God's divine plan. 

I don't say this to put down anyone who's a Christian and has been through divorce. I say this to encourage you to consider your marriage. Or your next marriage. Make sure you are marrying the one prince God has in store for you. Make sure you include Jesus in your marriage. You stand a better chance of making it last when you do. 

 

And remember...healthy marriages take work. Just like we need to eat healthy foods, exercise, get enough rest, and get out in the sunlight, our marriages need work as well. Prayer, communication, financial stability, loyalty, and much, much more build strong marriages. Neglecting marriage, like neglecting one's health, sets it up for death.

What does your marriage look like? Is it time to pump Jesus vitamins in to attack the bad vibes? Or is your marriage a healthy three-stranded chord?

Photo Copyright 1998 Debbie Burchard

Proverbs 10 - Love Covers

"Hatred stirs up strife,
 But love covers a multitude of sins."
 ~ Proverbs 10:12

Vic and I will celebrate our 13th anniversary this October. So many times I've thanked God for blessing me with a husband who strives to be a man of God, works hard to provide for our family, and challenges me to be a stronger woman in the Lord and better mother to my children.

Our relationship is strong. We're loyal to one another. We communicate (most of the time). We spend time together each day. We put our relationship before the kids, as is proper order in a Christian home. After all, if the kids always come first, how are they supposed to learn what a proper marriage covenant looks like?

However, there are days my conversations with God go something like this:

"Lord, he's driving me nuts. Why does he have to do that? Why can't he just accept the truth and get on with it? Why won't he pick up his darned socks so his kids will pick up their darned toys? Do they think I'm their maid? I so do not feel like a mother and a wife right now. I feel like the hired help who doesn't get paid. Why can't he see that acts of service is my love language? I'm so tired of this!"

The key to keeping my marriage solid is that I take everything to God first. Sometimes I sound ridiculous and can pick out my own sin while I'm spouting to God. Other times, He reassures me that I know what I'm talking about. 

I don't allow hatred to build up inside of me like a time bomb waiting to explode in the direction of my husband. I don't cause strife by spewing my heart's troubles all over my husband concerning what wrong he's supposedly done me. I take it to God. If I need more wisdom, I go to my pastor's wife or another trusted mature Christian friend. 

If I allowed the things that irritate me to get in the way of my marriage, it would have ended in the first five years. What I realized before I walked the aisle is that I entered a covenant relationship. And with God's assistance, that covenant would never break. God designed marriage to be between one man and one woman, for man to never separate. I can't allow the minor flaws in my husband's personality to get in the way of that covenant. 

I've discovered that love covers a multitude of sin, just as the Word tells us it does. Just because I don't like one thing or another on various days of the week doesn't mean I don't love my husband. It's my love for him that covers a multitude of sin. It's Jesus' love for me that reminds me I, like my husband, fall short of the glory of God. It's Jesus' love inside of me that takes the conditions off of my love for my husband and children. I don't love them because... I love them because of Jesus.

What about you? Do you allow the flaws in yourself or your husband to come between your covenant relationship before God? Or do you love him unconditionally with the love of Jesus in your heart?

Proverbs 8 - The Still Small Voice

"Blessed is the man who listens to me...

For whoever finds me finds life, 

And obtains favor from the Lord;

But he who sins against me wrongs his own soul;

All those who hate me love death."

~ Proverbs 8:34a, 35-36

 

Some days life gets stormy, and I cry out, "Lord! Help! Give me wisdom to make the right choice here!" I sit and wait for thirty seconds before huffing and wondering why I haven't heard an answer yet. Can you relate?

 

Everything is going well, and in one split second, my day can be ruined. The thunder starts to sound in my head, and the rains start to fog over my mind. I wonder why I can't hear the Lord or if I've heard Him correctly. I become critical of everything and feel bitterness rising up within as I wonder why God hasn't answered me yet. As if I deserve an immediate response...

 

I've had plenty of these days. All it takes to trigger them is a spilled cup of coffee on my fresh outfit, a whiny attitude in my child, or a missed receipt causing an overdraft of my checking account. And the storm begins. And it doesn't end until I give it over to the Lord, who calms the winds and the sea.

When I'm stewing over minor issues in life, I tend to tell the Lord a lot but forget to listen. In stopping my ranting and stilling my spirit, I can finally hear the still small voice that speaks ever so gently. In listening for His voice, I can make decisions that will lead me to life-giving choices. 

But if I keep raging, sin rears up and strikes, taking life with it.

This Proverb speaks of finding life and obtaining favor from the Lord. Sometimes the rain is necessary, refreshing the things in my spirit and causing me to grow in the process. Other times, I cause my own storms and wrong my soul in the areas of sin I'm fully aware of. It's my choice to rock the boat or let the Lord still the waters.

What about you? Do you listen for God to answer in the storm, or do you rock the boat, trying to get out of it your own way?

Photo Copyright 2010 Alycia W. Morales

 

 

 

 

Proverbs 3 - Have No Fear

 

“Do not be afraid of sudden terror,

Nor of trouble from the wicked when it comes;

For the Lord will be your confidence,

And will keep your foot from being caught.”

~Proverbs 3:25-26

I read past this Proverb several times before I came to understand what it means…

I ran. I exasperated my breath. I needed to stop and catch it. But I couldn’t. The large Doberman Pincers continued chasing me. They were close now. I had to keep running.

As I ran through the pitch blackness, I searched for an escape. None appeared. The dogs shortened the distance between us with their long-legged gait. I looked over my shoulder, hoping they’d get distracted and stop their chase.

It seemed hopeless. The lead dog gained on my heels. He could reach me now. He nipped at the back of my legs.

And then, just as he was about to bite into my heel, a large hand lifted me out of the darkness. I knew God had saved me from the wicked. And I woke up.

I back slid after giving my life to the Lord. I left home to move in with a boyfriend. He became verbally and, eventually, physically abusive.

I worked the graveyard shift at a local diner. I arrived home exhausted and desiring to lie down to sleep. After climbing into bed, I lay with my eyes open, wondering why I couldn’t drift off.

A firm, audible, fatherly voice spoke into the air. “If you don’t go home now, you’ll never see your eternal home.” I knew I’d heard the clear voice of my Father God.

I had to act quickly, or I would never return. Either my heart would grow cold to the Spirit’s guidance or I’d be the victim of someone’s rage.

God plucked me out of that situation and my sin pattern that morning, just as he’d pluck me out of the dream a year later.

We’re never in so deep that God can’t make a drastic change in our lives. All it takes is our willingness to heed His call to our heart. I left the apartment that night. I rededicated my life to Jesus, and I never looked back. This time, I determined to do it God’s way and not my own. I can only tell you that He’s done incredible things in my life since. Because I simply said, “Yes, Lord."

Photo Courtesy of Dobrzyski