Friday, October 26, 2012

Stand


Have you ever tried to do something apart from God and His will? I have. Either I get antsy and run ahead of God or I get fearful and take matters into my own hands.

Just as God promised Abram that he would be the father of nations, God promised me that my children would be all right. I wasn't to worry about them.

God came to Abram and spoke. "I am Almighty God; walk before Me and be blameless. And I will make My covenant between Me and you, and will multiply you exceedingly." Then Abram fell on his face, and God talked with him, saying: "As for Me, behold, My covenant is with you, and you shall be a father to many nations (Gen. 17:1-4)."

God speaks to us through His word. One morning, before school ended last spring, God revealed this verse to me during my time in His Word: "I do not pray that You should take them out of the world, but that You should keep them from the evil one. They are not of the world, just as I am not of the world. Sanctify them by Your truth. Your word is truth (John 17:15-17)."

I heard that my children should not be taken out of the world, but that God would continue to protect them from the evil one. I should have started praying that God would sanctify my children by His truth. I should have started covering them in His Word.

Instead, like Abram, I took matters into my own hands. I figured I could protect them by bringing them home for school. Like Abram, I found that my plan wasn't better than God's plan for my children.

I have faced failure this past quarter of the school year. I have faced a pouting, whiny face every morning. I have faced the fact that I am not equipped to teach my seventh grader. The math he's doing is the math I failed at doing when I was in school. And I still don't get it. I have battled within myself as I've considered if my protection is preventing them from dealing with issues they will face into adulthood. And I've remembered God's promise to me through a prophet so many years ago, when my oldest was only a toddler: "Don't worry about your children. They will be fine."

In my desire to bootstrap, to stubbornly do it my way, I've avoided that Holy Ground. And I've lived frustrated in every minute of it. When I release my will and my need to be in control, I walk that holy ground, and I live free in the abundance of life Jesus promises His children.

Humbly, I am turning my children's protection back over to God. I will let Him do His job and I will fulfill my responsibility to trust Him with everything He owns, especially my children. They will return to a school building, where teachers will teach them math, history, language arts, and science. And I will provide that safe, secure place for them to come home to where they will be loved unconditionally, taught the Word of the Lord, and directed down the path God will take them as they journey through this thing called Life.

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1 comment:

  1. Don't beat yourself up, Alycia. I'm confident you had your kids' best interests at heart. Every mama wants to protect her babies, so now you'll shift gears and protect them in a different way.

    Praying for you as you make the transition. (And for your 7th grader with the math!)

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